


Tremolo

by butterflyslinky



Category: The Squire's Tales Series - Gerald Morris
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, First Meetings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 23:48:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8774512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflyslinky/pseuds/butterflyslinky
Summary: Dinadan meets the perfect guy. Maybe a little too perfect.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [azurish](https://archiveofourown.org/users/azurish/gifts).



> I can't tell you how happy I am to find another fan of this series and pairing in the world. The idea for this story is just part of a larger AU my sister and I have been playing with for a while. There might be more coming later--this was just a really good jumping-off point. Hope you enjoy!

_How should I your true love know_  
From another one?  
By his cockle hat and staff,  
And his sandal shoon. 

“That’s not right,” Dinadan said, stopping his accompaniment.

Brangienne growled at him. “So what is right, oh mighty composer?”

“You’re a bit too low,” Dinadan said.

“It’s an alto line!”

“And you’re singing it like you’re a fucking baritone!” Dinadan snapped back. “You’re playing Ophelia! You’re the ingénue! Sing like an ingénue!”

“If you wanted a fucking ingénue, you should have cast Iseult,” Brangienne snapped back.

“God, no,” Dinadan muttered. “First off, she’s a diva. Second off, she can’t sing for shit.” He smirked. “Besides, she’s put on a lot of weight since she and Mark broke up…again.”

Brangienne smacked him with her sheet music. “She may be a bitch, but that doesn’t mean you’re entitled to make comments about her weight. Besides, Tristram has already asked her out so they’re back together…again.”

Dinadan rolled his eyes. “I don’t get it,” he said. “What does she see in him?”

“You’re saying that because he’s your brother,” Brangienne pointed out. “I wonder what he sees in her.”

“At least she hasn’t taken ten years and most of her dad’s savings to get a degree in anything!”

“You weren’t her experimental girlfriend. Talk about high-maintenance!”

Dinadan grinned a bit. “Of course I wasn’t,” he said. “But that’s not the point.” He adjusted his music and played the intro again. “Try again, Brangienne. We’ve only got two months before this production is supposed to go.”

She rolled her eyes. “It’s a college production of Hamlet that you added music to.”

“Brangienne.”

“Right.” She took a breath and started singing again.

*

Palomides smiled as the noise from the practice room turned from bickering back to music. He always loved studying in the music hall and listening to the music majors rehearse, but this particular practice room was occupied by two of the loudest, most foul-mouthed and most argumentative musicians he’d ever heard. Not that he knew either of them. There was enough affection in their tones that he guessed that they were friends, but they did argue a lot.

He reflected that he could have moved down the hall and found a different door to listen at, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Once the two of them actually started rehearsing, the music was some of the best Palomides had heard. The piano playing was gorgeous, played by someone obviously very skilled at his craft. The girl’s singing was different from any of the other singers, and it made the hairs on the back of Palomides’s neck stand up.

_He is dead and gone, lady,_

_He is dead and gone._

_At his head a grass-green turf,_

_At his feet a stone._

Palomides resumed typing, letting the angelic music from the other side of the door wash over him. He had no idea who had composed it, but he knew that if he met that person, he would unequivocally fall in love with them.

*

“You going to the Pride meeting?” Brangienne asked as she and Dinadan packed up.

“No,” Dinadan said. “Mandatory Kappa Ro meeting. Arthur would murder me if I didn’t show again.”

“Still can’t believe you managed to pledge Kappa Ro,” Brangienne commented. “You don’t belong with those guys.”

Dinadan shrugged. “They’re not all bad,” he said. “And it’s a legacy thing. I can’t be the only Fen not in Kappa Ro.”

“But you’re different,” Brangienne argued. “Kappa Ro is full of athletes and manly men and…you know…straight people.”

“Not all of them are straight,” Dinadan mumbled. “And there are plenty of them who aren’t in a sport.” He picked up his shoulder bag. “Besides, Gary promised he’d buy the drinks after.”

“Right,” Brangienne said. “Save me a space at the table, then.” She turned and left the room. Dinadan shook his head and followed, looking over his sheet music.

He was so preoccupied that he didn’t notice the guy sitting on the floor just outside until he literally tripped over him. “FUCK!” Dinadan said as he fell, dropping his score everywhere.

“I’m so sorry,” a deep, rich, and absolutely gorgeous voice said. “Please, let me help you.”

Dinadan looked up to see a very tall, dark-skinned man smiling at him. Dinadan swallowed a few times. Whoever this man was, he was ridiculously good-looking and had the best voice that Dinadan had ever had the pleasure of hearing after three years of listening to the best voices at the university.

“No, it’s my fault,” Dinadan said as soon as his brain caught up with him. “I wasn’t watching where I was going.” He bent to pick up his scattered papers.

“But I was the one sitting in the middle of the hall.” Mr. Perfect Voice got up and started helping Dinadan pick up the papers. “I should have found a table, but I was listening to your most lovely music.”

Dinadan grinned. “You heard that, did you?” he said. “You really think it’s beautiful?”

“But of course.” Mr. Perfect Voice smiled as he handed Dinadan the rest of the score. “Your piano playing is most superb. Tell me, who is the composer?”

Dinadan blushed. “Um…I am,” he said. “It’s my project for composition…I wrote music for Hamlet…we’re showing it in April…uh…you know. If you were interested.”

Mr. Perfect Voice beamed widely. “I am very interested,” he said. “You are a composition major?”

“Yeah,” Dinadan said. “Composition with minors in English and linguistics.” He hesitated then held out his hand. “Dinadan Fen.”

Mr. Perfect Voice shook his hand. “Palomides d’Araby,” he said. “Classical studies with a minor in music.”

Dinadan grinned. “Want to be a starving artist with the rest of us, eh?”

Palomides smiled. “I don’t think I’ll starve.” He pulled out his phone and checked the time. “Forgive me…I have to go to basketball practice.” He glanced at Dinadan. “Will I see you again, Dinadan Fen?”

Dinadan forced himself to breathe normally. “Probably,” he said. “I’m always here in the afternoon.”

“Good.” Palomides turned and left the building.

*

“Wait a second,” Gaheris said. “Wait a hot second. You fell over Palomides d’Araby? He’s like…you know…a giant.”

“He’s not a giant,” Dinadan said. “He’s just…tall. Very tall. Like most basketball players.” He took another sip of his beer. “You know him?”

“Sort of,” Gaheris said. “Gareth’s on the basketball team with him…apparently he got a full ride just to play here.”

“That explains it,” Dinadan said. “He said he was majoring in classical studies. I was wondering why he’d come halfway around the world to do that.”

“This school has a classical studies major?” Gaheris’s girlfriend Lynet asked. “And people actually take it?”

“At least one does,” Dinadan said. “I think he’s wasting his talents just minoring in music, though.”

Gaheris and Lynet exchanged amused looks. “Good vocal skills?” Lynet asked.

Dinadan allowed his expression to go a little bit dreamy. “It’s like Keith David and Christopher Lee had a baby who then developed an accent,” he said.

“I knew it!” Lynet crowed. “You’ve got a crush!”

“What? I do not!” Dinadan swatted at her. “I just met the guy for like, two minutes three hours ago! I know nothing about him except his name, major and that he plays basketball. And he likes my music.”

“It’s a start,” Gaheris said just as Brangienne came stomping over to the table.

“Bad meeting?” Dinadan asked as Brangienne collapsed next to him.

“Our Pride club is a joke,” she said. “They don’t know the first thing about intersectional activism! It’s all just a bunch of totally gay white people and their stupid ‘allies’ who never think about other people on the queer spectrum! They were all banging on about how there’s marriage equality so we need to fight to keep that, instead of thinking about all the other issues…”

“We know, Brangienne,” Lynet cut in. “Save the rant for class tomorrow, okay?” She signaled the waitress.

“Right, sorry,” Brangienne muttered. “Strawberry mojito,” she said to the waitress before turning back to the group. “So what’d I miss?”

“Dinadan’s in love,” Gaheris said.

“I am not!” Dinadan snapped.

Brangienne grinned. “Really? With who? Not Kai again?”

“I was never in love with Kai!”

“You so were,” Gaheris said. “But no. Palomides d’Araby. Star of the basketball team and classical studies major, apparently.”

“Was he the guy typing outside the practice room today?” Brangienne said.

“Yeah,” Dinadan said. “I tripped over him.”

“Ah, well, we know what that means,” Brangienne said with a grin.

“Standard romance trope,” Lynet agreed. “Our protagonist is deep and beautiful but very clumsy and just happens to fall over the man of his dreams. They instantly fall in love, date, get married and have nine adopted babies who still somehow retain the best traits of both.”

Dinadan glared. “I fucking hate you.”

*

Palomides was sitting outside the practice room when Dinadan and Brangienne left the next day. Brangienne smirked at Dinadan and turned to walk in the other direction. Dinadan rolled his eyes, but then smiled at Palomides.

“Hey,” Dinadan said, feeling a bit awkward.

“Hello,” Palomides said. “You sounded wonderful today.”

“Thanks,” Dinadan said. He shifted a bit. “So…you minor in music? What’s your instrument?”

“I play the cello,” Palomides said, standing up. “But I fear my skill is lacking.”

“I’m sure it isn’t,” Dinadan said. “You’ll have let me judge for myself sometime.”

“No, no,” Palomides said. “I would be ashamed to play for someone as skilled as you.” He smiled. “Do you have other instruments besides piano?”

“Violin,” Dinadan said. “And guitar.” He hesitated. “Should we continue this discussion over dinner? It’s late and I haven’t eaten today.”

Palomides’s smile slipped. “Why not?”

Dinadan shrugged. “I have a full schedule on Tuesdays,” he said. “And my eleven o’clock is Composition and Arranging, and I got so caught up in my project that I didn’t even realize I’d stayed an extra hour until Brangienne came to tell me we’d be late for Chorale. And then we were in here all afternoon rehearsing.”

“Brangienne is the lovely alto?” Palomides asked as they started walking toward the cafeteria.

“Yeah. She’s playing Ophelia in Hamlet so she’s got a lot to learn.”

“And she is your girlfriend?”

Dinadan laughed aloud. “What? No.” He grinned. “She’s really not my type. And I’m really not hers. We’re just good friends.”

“She is very pretty,” Palomides said.

Dinadan’s heart sank a little, but he smiled. “Well, sure,” he said. Ah, fuck it. There was a rainbow patch on his shoulder bag; surely Palomides hadn’t missed it. “But, um…I don’t like girls that way.”

“Oh.” Palomides looked a bit surprised, but recovered quickly. “So you like boys?”

“Yes,” Dinadan said firmly. “Is that a problem?”

“No,” Palomides said quickly. “I just…I haven’t met many boys who like boys.”

Dinadan relaxed a bit. “Where did you come from, anyway?” he asked, eager to get off the subject.

“Turkey,” Palomides said. “Though my family has lived in America for a while now.”

“And you play basketball.”

“Yes. I’m on scholarship.” They reached the cafeteria and picked up their trays. “Do you like basketball?”

Dinadan shrugged. “Liked it all right when we played it in gym back in high school, but I wasn’t good at it. Or any sport, really.”

“Do you like watching?” Palomides asked, sounding a bit shy.

“I mean…I’ve never been to a game,” Dinadan said. “Basketball season is always when I’m busiest with school.” He paid for his dinner and found a table, Palomides right behind him.

“What do you do besides school?” Palomides asked. “Surely you don’t just live in the music building?”

Dinadan grinned.  “I sort of do,” he said. “But I’m in Kappa Ro Theta if that counts…not that I participate much, but it’s nice to have somewhere to go outside of the music hall.”

Palomides nodded. “I know of it,” he said. “You did the car wash in the fall? For the children’s hospital?”

“Yeah, that was us,” Dinadan said. “Well, us and our sister sorority…Lambda Omicron Xi? Their president organized it…she just made us show up and look pretty.” He grinned. “Except me. She had me handing out flyers because no one wants to see me shirtless.”

Palomides smiled. “I’m sure that’s not true,” he said.

“You don’t have to be nice,” Dinadan said. “I’m the gay hipster music nerd. Car wash centerfolds were never in my future.”

Palomides laughed and Dinadan kept grinning, trying not to blush too much.

Maybe he did have a crush.

*

There was a knock on the practice room door. Dinadan frowned, and then went to answer it. People usually didn’t bother him when he was practicing violin.

Palomides was standing outside, cloth grocery bag in hand. “I brought you lunch,” he said cheerfully.

Dinadan raised an eyebrow. “How do you know I haven’t had lunch?” he asked.

“I was studying in here this morning,” Palomides said. “I saw you come in at nine o’clock. I listened to you play for three hours, realized you weren’t coming out anytime soon, and went to get lunch.” He held out the bag. “You also admitted you forget to eat before, and I wish to remedy that.”

“You’re not fattening me up to eat me, are you?” Dinadan teased, going over to a table in the lobby.

Palomides smiled. “Islam does not permit cannibalism,” he said. “But you were complaining how being a car wash centerfold wasn’t in your future. I think it could be, if you eat properly and exercise.” He opened the bag and started pulling out various containers. “Here. I wasn’t sure what you liked, so I got something of everything.”

Dinadan stared. “There’s enough here to feed ten people,” he said.

“Whatever you don’t eat can go in the fridge,” Palomides said.

“Aren’t you eating?” Dinadan asked, grabbing the nearest container and opening it.

“I brought this for you,” Palomides said as though it was obvious.

Dinadan picked up a fork. “If I’m eating, you’re eating,” he said. “After all, you’re an athlete. Gotta keep up that manly strength.”

Palomides protested again, but Dinadan gave him a pointed look and he gave in. They ate in comfortable silence and amazingly, managed to finish more than half of what Palomides had brought.

“Thanks,” Dinadan said. He smiled shyly. “Would you like to come into the practice room to listen?”

Palomides nodded eagerly. “I’d like that very much,” he said.

“You should bring your cello,” Dinadan said. “Practice a bit yourself.”

“I’d be…”

“Ashamed in the face of a master, yeah, yeah,” Dinadan finished. “Look, even if you completely suck, which I doubt because so far you’re fucking perfect, the only way you’ll get better is by doing.”

Palomides hesitated, then nodded. “I will fetch it.” He headed off down the hall.

Dinadan headed back into the practice room. A few minutes later, Palomides came in, carrying a cello. He pulled up a chair and started tuning.

Dinadan waited for him to finish before he smiled encouragingly. “Go on,” he said.

“I fear you will not be impressed,” Palomides said.

“Don’t worry about impressing me,” Dinadan said. “I’m already pretty much sold.”

Palomides picked up the bow and began to play a slow, mournful tune that Dinadan didn’t know. A few bars in, Palomides began to sing, his voice just as low and rich as it was when he spoke. Dinadan sat in his chair, listening in wonder.

Okay. Definitely a crush.

*

“Hey, Din.” Gaheris was using his much-too-casual scheming voice. “So there’s a basketball game tonight and Gareth has been moved up and it’s his first time starting so I should really go but Lynet and Bragienne are both busy with a women’s rights march, so you wanna go with me?”

Dinadan rolled his eyes. “I’m already planning to go, Gary. Palomides asked me to yesterday.”

“Oh.” Gaharis sounded a bit disappointed. “Are you already dating him without my help?”

“What? No!” Dinadan said. “I’m pretty sure he’s straight. We’re just friends. He plays the cello.”

“Vital information, I’m sure,” Gaheris said. “So you’ll come and sit with me?”

“Yeah, I will,” Dinadan said. “Is that all?”

“Should be,” Gaheris said. “You’re not still in the music hall, are you?”

“I’m walking back,” Dinadan said. “If you’d literally waited three minutes, we could have discussed this in person.”

“No we couldn’t,” Gaheris said. “Gawain and Kai are playing the Lord of the Rings drinking game again and they’re getting pretty loud.”

“In that case, I’m going to Brangienne’s,” Dinadan said. “I don’t need a headache tonight.”

He could hear Gaheris pouting through the phone. “Asshole,” Gaheris said.

“Yeah, I know,” Dinadan said. “Call me when they’ve passed out.” He hung up.

*

In the three years Dinadan had attended university, he had never once gone to a basketball game. He’d been to a few football games to cheer on his frat brothers, but basketball wasn’t as big a deal and the few brothers who played weren’t offended if not everyone showed up.

It was similar to a football game in a few respects, though not many. The stands were still crowded and there was still a lot of energy, but it wasn’t quite as violent. Dinadan scanned the court where the players were warming up and spotted Palomides almost immediately. Dinadan swallowed. Basketball jerseys should have been illegal if they made already hot guys look even hotter.

Gaheris noticed his preoccupation and grinned. “He is pretty good-looking,” he said. “For a dude.”

“Don’t no-homo this,” Dinadan said. “By the way, do you understand the rules?”

Gaheris grinned. “Nope!” he said cheerfully. “I know they’re trying to put the ball through a basket.”

“Thanks for the insight, Mr. Athletic,” Dinadan said drily.

“We should have made signs,” Gaheris said. “You know, huge signs saying ‘Go Gereth’ or ‘Rah rah!’ or ‘Will Palomides go out with me…’”

Dinadan swatted at him. “Shut the fuck up, Gary.”

“Come on, Din, you can’t just wait around…”

“You are the worst friend ever.” He glanced around. “Aren’t Gawain and Agravaine coming?”

“No,” Gaheris said, his smile slipping. “Agravaine has an essay due tomorrow that he’s barely started on and Gawain…Gawain said Gareth would survive without him here.”

“Jeez, is he still mad that Gareth asked to be Lancelot’s Little instead of his?” Dinadan asked.

“Probably,” Gaheris said with a sigh. “But…well, you know…Gawain’s pledged his brothers until now. It hurt when Gareth said he didn’t want to be with Gawain…not that Gawain shows it, but…”

“Yeah.” Dinadan frowned as he scanned the bleachers. He finally spotted Lancelot in the second row with Guinevere.

“It’s okay,” Gaheris said. “They’ll work it out in the end.”

*

The game itself wasn’t terribly exciting to Dinadan, though he did make sure to cheer loudly when Palomides scored the first basket. Palomides looked up and smiled at him and Dinadan’s heart felt like it was going to burst right out of his chest.

Because on the court, Palomides was even more gorgeous than usual. Dinadan had to constantly fight down the urge to just stare at his friend’s legs and arms and focus on what was actually happening. Unfortunately, since he didn’t really get basketball, the endeavor was a bit useless.

Their team won, which meant the gym was very loud as they were trying to leave. “Should we wait for them?” Dinadan shouted over the noise.

“Probably,” Gaheris said. “Ask if they want to come to the bar with us, at least, though they’ll probably go with the team.”

It took a very long time to fight their way out of the stadium and back into the lobby, and even longer to get to Palomides. He was surrounded by various admirers, most of them women, and Dinadan’s stomach twisted. Still, he put on a smile as he made his way over.

Palomides spotted him and waved to him with a grin. Dinadan got through the crowd. “Good game,” he said.

“Thank you for coming,” Palomides said. “I did not think you would.”

“Of course I came,” Dinadan said. “You’ve brought me lunch every day for three weeks. Least I can do is watch you play sportsball.”

“You said you have little interest,” Palomides said. “I hope you enjoyed it anyway.”

Dinadan shrugged. “It was pretty exciting,” he said. “Listen, Gaheris and I were going to head downtown and get drinks…you wanna come with us?”

Palomides hesitated, then smiled again. “Sure,” he said. “Let me get changed. And I’ll drive.”

“Oh…you don’t have to…”

“I don’t drink,” Palomides said. “But I’d love to come with you.”

“Well…great!” Dinadan said. “Meet you out front in…is ten minutes enough time to get away from your ardent admirers?”

Palomides looked at the girls standing a few feet away, giggling and glancing at him. “Better make it fifteen.”

*

It did take fifteen minutes for Palomides to join them. Gareth had declined to go with them, so the three of them headed off and soon settled into Dinadan and Gaheris’s usual bar.

“You’re Gareth’s brother?” Palomides said to Gaheris. “But you seem much less…”

“Arrogant?” Gaheris said.

“I do not mean to speak ill of your family,” Palomides said hastily.

“Nah, it’s okay,” Gaheris said with a wave of his hand. “Gareth is…well, he’s young and he’s doing pretty well for a freshman. He’s entitled to a bit of cockiness.”

“He is good at the sport,” Palomides agreed. “I take it you don’t play anything?”

“Nah,” Gaheris said. “Din and I are the proud non-athletes of Kappa Ro Theta.”

“Which means we’re the ones who do most of the tutoring,” Dinadan added.

“What are you studying?” Palomides asked Gaheris politely.

“Agricultural engineering,” Gaheris said. “My dad has a pretty big commercial farm and no one else is interested in running it one day, so it’s all on me.”

“Sounds fascinating,” Palomides said, and he actually sounded sincere.

“Oh, fuck, don’t get him started,” Dinadan groaned.

“Why not?” Palomides asked. “Agriculture is the very backbone of society. Without it…”

“There’s no food,” Gaheris finished. “I’m studying techniques to increase food supply and make farming more efficient.”

Dinadan signaled the waitress. He was going to need a lot more beer to get through this.

*

Lynet and Brangienne came in an hour later. Dinadan was already well on the way to plastered—in spite of being in a frat for three years, he’d remained a complete lightweight. He grinned and shouted over the noise. “Bran! Lyn!”

The girls rolled their eyes as they came over. “Hey, boys,” Brangienne said. “How was the game?”

“Very good, thank you,” Palomides said. “I don’t believe we’ve met.” He offered his hand. “Palomides d’Araby.”

Brangienne grinned. “Brangienne Joyer,” she said. “And this is Lynet Perle.” She plopped down across from Palomides and Lynet took the last empty seat next to Gaheris. “So you’re the guy who takes care of Dinny.”

“I try to,” Palomides said. “And you’re the fantastic alto.”

“I like him,” Brangienne declared to Dinadan. “We’re keeping him.”

“Already planned on it,” Dinadan slurred.

“How was the march?” Gaheris asked.

“Not too bad,” Lynet said. “We didn’t get arrested, anyway.”

Dinadan stopped listening. He was too busy watching Palomides, who looked rather bewildered but in good humor. God, the man never stopped being attractive.

Without thinking, Dinadan leaned over and kissed Palomides on the cheek. Palomides turned, startled. The table stopped talking. Gaheris, Lynet and Brangienne exchanged glances.

“Dinadan?” Palomides said.

“I think I need to go…um…powder my nose,” Brangienne said hastily. “Lyn, can you come tell me if I look okay?”

“Yeah,” Lynet said. The girls got up and dashed toward the bathroom.

Gaheris looked extremely uncomfortable. “I’ll just, um…smoke break,” he muttered before he too made a hasty exit.

Palomides was still staring at Dinadan, looking very confused. “Dinadan?” he asked again, softly.

Dinadan leaned in and pressed his lips to Palomides’s. He only stayed for a few seconds before he pulled away. “I like you,” he declared. “You’re so fucking beautiful and I love everything about you and I really, really wish you were into guys and I’m sorry I just kissed you without permission but I don’t think I’ll ever have another shot and…”

Palomides pressed a finger to Dinadan’s lips to silence him. “You’re drunk,” he said. “I don’t think this is a good time to say anything.”

“If I wasn’t drunk, I’d never…”

“I know.” Palomides smiled softly. “Why don’t we talk tomorrow?”

“Okay,” Dinadan said. “Tomorrow’s good…tomorrow we can…eat takeout like normal…”

“Sure,” Palomides said. “Like normal.” He glanced at his phone. “Why don’t you ask someone to go find your ladies? I think you should go home.”

*

Dinadan didn’t recall much else. The next thing he was fully aware of, he was waking up in his room at the frat house and someone was pounding on the door.

“Unless you have coffee, fuck off!” he groaned.

“I do have coffee,” came a low voice from the other side. “Along with aspirin, breakfast and a note.”

Dinadan staggered out of bed and opened the door to find his Big, Kai, on the other side. “Were you sent up here to pity me?” Dinadan asked as Kai shoved a tray at him.

“Sort of,” Kai said. “Mostly, I just happened to be the one who answered the door when the giant with the sexy voice showed up.” He handed Dinadan a folded piece of paper. “He asked me to give you this.”

Dinadan sat down at his desk and took the paper, but didn’t open it. “Fuck,” he muttered. “It’s probably to tell me to never fucking contact him again.”

Kai raised an eyebrow and sat down on the bed. “What happened?” he asked, his voice gentler than usual.

Dinadan took a deep breath. “So…there’s this guy…Palomides…and I like him,” he said. “A lot…and we were friends, and he was really nice to me and…and last night, we went out after his game…you know, just guys, Gary was there, and Lynet and Brangienne showed up later…and…and I was drunk because Gary was talking about fucking agronomy again and…and then I kissed Palomides and…and he said we’d talk, but…I mean…I’m pretty sure he’s straight and even if he isn’t, he wouldn’t want me and I think I just fucked up our friendship and I don’t want to read this note because he’s probably telling me to fuck off.”

Kai sat silent for a minute. “Wow,” he finally said. “That’s, um…yeah, that’s shit, Din,” he said.

“Thanks,” Dinadan muttered.

“But you don’t know,” Kai said. “Read the note. Maybe he still wants to be friends. He probably understands you were drunk…maybe he wants to talk now that you’re not.”

Dinadan took a breath. “Can you read it?” he asked. “I don’t…if he says to go away, I don’t want to have to see it.”

“No,” Kai said. “You have to face your problems, Din…I’ll help you, but you have to read it yourself.” He smiled gently. “Maybe eat breakfast first,” he said. “You’ll feel better once you’ve got something in your stomach.

Dinadan took several deep breaths, forcing himself not to cry. “I don’t think I can,” he said.

“You need to,” Kai insisted. “Go on.”

It took far longer than Dinadan would like to admit to choke down the toast and coffee Kai had brought, but he finally managed. Once he was finished, he took another shuddering breath before he unfolded the letter.

_Dear Dinadan,_

_I have something to tell you. I would have preferred to do it in person, but my words are better on paper than aloud. Please forgive me this form of communication, especially since I fear you may be distressed._

_First, I would like to say that I am not upset about last night. I was surprised at your affection, but not dismayed until I remembered you were drunk and therefore your words were not truly yours. If you meant what you said, I will be beyond happy._

_You see, from the moment I heard your music, I knew I would fall in love with the composer. The melodies spoke to my heart and soul and I swore that if I ever met the one who wrote them, I would give my heart and soul to him. It was luck that I found you, and even luckier that I found I do like you, enough to keep my promise._

_I love your music, but it is more than that. I love your manner of speech. I love the way you treat me like any other friend, even though I am said to be a great athlete. I love the way you don’t judge me by my race and religion. I love the way you don’t censor yourself around me like so many others do. I love your eyes, and your hands when you play piano, and the look of peace on your face when you play your violin. I love the way you encourage me to play the cello more often and I love that you think I am any good at it._

_I love having lunch with you, and taking care of you. I love listening to you argue with Brangienne, because I know you will still be her friend. I love how you would come to a game to see me, even though you don’t enjoy it._

_And most of all, I loved how it felt when you kissed me drunk—I would love even more to know how it feels when you kiss me sober._

_If you want to show me, I’ll be in our practice room._

_Palomides._

Dinadan stared at the letter for a long time. It felt like the breath had been knocked out of him entirely.

Kai watched him carefully. “Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Dinadan said. “Yeah, more than okay.” He smiled, a little at first but soon widely. “I have to go…thanks for breakfast.”

Kai grinned at him. “Hey, it’s my job.”

*

Dinadan took a deep breath as he entered the music building. He was happy Palomides shared his affection, but a bit nervous. He hadn’t had a boyfriend since high school, and that had been very short-lived; what if he was terrible at relationships?

Still, faint heart never won fair gentleman or whatever, so Dinadan headed down the hall to the practice room that was always unofficially his. He braced himself and opened the door.

Palomides was there, seated on the piano bench but not playing. He looked around when he heard the door open and smiled at Dinadan.

Dinadan swallowed, suddenly frozen. Palomides looked as good as ever and Dinadan…well, Dinadan was five feet, five inches of mediocrity in everything except music.

“Hey,” Dinadan finally said.

“Hello,” Palomides said.

There was an awkward silence before Dinadan took a breath. “I did mean it,” he said. “All of it…you’re beautiful. And…and I think I’ve had a crush on you ever since I fell over you in the hall.”

Palomides’s smile widened. He stood up and crossed to the door. The next thing Dinadan knew, he was wrapped in a pair of strong arms, pulled close into Palomides’s chest.

“Can I kiss you?” Palomides whispered.

“Oh, fuck, yes,” Dinadan breathed.

Palomides bent his head and kissed Dinadan, soft and gentle and warm and everything Dinadan ever wanted. Dinadan clung to the front of Palomide’s sweater and kissed back desperately, trying to match the kiss and sure he failed.

They broke apart after a few glorious minutes. Dinadan looked helplessly into Palomides’s eyes. “I…”

“Don’t talk,” Palomides said. “That was better…so much better than drunk.”

“Close the door,” Dinadan breathed. “I want to do that again.”

*

“So,” Brangienne asked. “How do you reconcile a Muslim faith with queer culture?”

Palomides shrugged. “Where I come from, there is no law against it; I have lived in the west for long enough to have seen how people support it; and I have come to accept myself for who I am. And religion is largely interpretive; there are many contradictory parts of my faith. Why couldn’t this be one of them?”

Brangienne nodded thoughtfully. “You two should come to Pride meetings,” she said. “We need more diversity in there.”

Dinadan sighed. “We’re not just tokens, you know,” he said. “And you know we’re both busy.”

“Just saying,” Brangienne said.

Palomides laughed. “I’ll consider it,” he said. “But right now, I think you’re both supposed to be rehearsing.”

“He’s right,” Dinadan said. “Come on, Bran, we’ve only got a month left until we open…let’s do your duet with Hamlet again.”

Brangienne rolled her eyes and headed into the practice room. Dinadan kissed Palomides briefly. “See you for dinner?” he asked.

“Of course,” Palomides said. “My place…I’ll cook for you.”

Dinadan grinned. “My hero.”


End file.
